How to reframe the way you think about rejection

People have different ways of reacting to ‘bad’ news, some people from won’t try again, others simply bounce back stronger than before. Everyone experiences the sting of rejection, but mentally strong people use that pain to grow stronger and become better. 

Most people don’t just get told they are wonderful and never have any obstacles, which is sometimes hard to consider when people around you seem to be constantly successful. It’s fair to say that everyone gets a few knocks every now and again. But how should we react to this form of rejection? 

Here are some insightful ways those who have a growth mindset react to rejection. These behaviours might not be obvious but will allow you to learn and develop more in the long run. 

Acknowledge your personal emotions

Rather than suppress, ignore, or deny what emotions you might be feeling, people who  are  mentally strong, and emotionally aware acknowledge their emotions whole-heartedly. They admit when they're embarrassed, sad, disappointed, or discouraged. They have confidence in their ability to deal with uncomfortable emotions head-on, which is essential to coping with their discomfort healthily. Whether you've been stood up by a date or turned down for a promotion, rejection is never fun. Trying to minimise the pain by convincing yourself it was "no big deal" will only prolong your pain. The best way to deal with uncomfortable emotions is to face them head-on.

Treating yourself with kindness 

Rather than think, "You're so stupid for thinking you could do that," mentally strong people treat themselves with compassion. They respond to negative self-talk with kindness. Whether you got dumped by your long-term love or blindsided by a recent firing, beating yourself up will only keep you down. Speak to yourself like a trusted friend would. 

Refusing to let rejection define you

Emotionally aware people don't make huge generalisations when they're rejected. If one company turns them down for a job, they then think they are useless or incompetent. If they get rejected by a single love interest, they don't conclude they're unlovable. They keep rejection in proper perspective. One person's opinion, or one single incident, should never define who you are. Don't let this dent your your self-worth. 

Learn from it 

When this happens you, ask yourself, ”What did I gain from this?". Rather than simply ‘getting on with it’, turn it into an opportunity for self-growth. With each rejection, you become stronger.